Today was a shopping day,
practically mandatory when it’s 50 degrees out and raining.
My friend and I made the hour-long trek to the mall in Natick. We in Western Massachusetts might as well be living on the east side of Mars for all the shopping opportunities here. Usually I don’t mind – I’m retired, so my most taxing sartorial decision these days is which sweatshirt to wear with today’s jeans.
My friend and I made the hour-long trek to the mall in Natick. We in Western Massachusetts might as well be living on the east side of Mars for all the shopping opportunities here. Usually I don’t mind – I’m retired, so my most taxing sartorial decision these days is which sweatshirt to wear with today’s jeans.
Except
there’s an EVENT looming on the horizon. This means I need a dress, and not
just any dress. A MOG (Mother of the Groom)
dress. This also means I have to face the dreaded dressing room and its
sadistic mirrors. I had already made one hellish trip through the Grand Prix
traffic of route 84 outside of Hartford
to another distant mall. There I spent the afternoon stuffing my pasty winter
body into sparkly and unforgiving dresses while a herd of high school girls
skittered in and out of the dressing rooms trying on Prom Dresses.
“A 6? I can’t wear
a 6! Don’t they have any 4’s?”
Not good for
morale.
Today was no
different. I’ve been to Nordstrom’s, Lord & Taylor, Neiman Marcus (what was
I thinking? I can’t afford a belt there), and Macy’s.
My
goal is to find a dress somewhere between Nursing Home Resident and Cougar. The
problem is that I have one version of myself in my head, and the other – and
only too real – version in that dressing room mirror.
Thankfully,
we finished the day in a store that for both of us Virgos was like finding Mecca.
The Container
Store. The possibilities were infinite
for all of our compulsive color-coding, organizing, stacking, hanging, and
sorting needs.
I
sighed in relief, releasing the breath I’d been holding since that last
sequin-encrusted, spandex-riddled sheath.
Very humorous. So ya gotta use what you've got.
ReplyDeleteAn EVENT requiring a dress? One of my biggest nightmares. And the two versions of myself is frighteningly real too.
ReplyDeleteGood luck.
I laughed at your description of trying to find The Dress. I've been there, but fortunately for me I don't even have one in my closet, except for one I found in a vintage store that I'm saving for Halloween. Good luck! I love the Container Store, too. :-)
ReplyDeleteOh, been there and most recently. Had to have a fancy dress for a formal wedding last October. the biggest department store closest to me (30 minutes down the highway) is JC Penney. not exactly a place where you buy glamorous dresses. Target had NO fancy dresses.
ReplyDeleteAh, but can you wear a container?
ReplyDeleteOMG! You may be on to something there. . .
DeleteI don’t have a dress, not one; and now never will have. For any formal occasion - few and far between - I wear a suit, skirt suit or trouser suit. Preferably a glamorous trouser suit. I can’t be bothered with pantyhose (tights in English - for obvious reasons) - and heels. You can dress up any suit with silk blouses (shirts?). I NEVER wear sparkles. But I love hats.
ReplyDeleteI need a dress too for sister of the groom. It's gonna take some hunting and maybe slimming!
ReplyDelete