Old English teachers never die; they’re just doomed to silently correct the flawed grammar around them.
I can’t help it. While I don’t verbally interject corrections into others’ conversations, there’s often a second conversation running in my head. It’s not so much my need to set everyone else on the right path grammatically, it’s just the irritation of hearing words used incorrectly. All - The – Time.
Imagine how a math aficionado would feel (and this takes true imagination for someone as number-challenged as myself) going through life with people peppering their conversations with “2 + 2 = 5.”
I know I’ll cover this subject again, but the latest burrs under my saddle are:
Eugenia and me are going to the truck rally.
(Really? What if Eugenia was previously engaged at a gun swap? Would you say me is going to the truck rally? Then again, maybe you would.)
I’m bored of wearing this anti-alien-mind-meld aluminum helmet.
(Learn your prepositions! They are not interchangeable. The correct word is with. Perhaps your helmet isn’t as effective as you had believed.)
We’re waiting for our invite to the asphalt festival.
(People. Have we become so lazy that we can’t handle two more syllables? Invite is a verb. Invitation is the noun. For instance, you might eagerly attend the dedication of a landfill, but not a dedicate.)
I felt truly validated last night, though, when my husband and I were watching episode 5 of this season’s Game of Thrones.
Everyone at Castle Black is milling about in furs and scratchy woolens going “Aarrghh!” when one of the leaders says, “Let them die! Less enemies for us!”
The camera then pans to my new hero, Stannis Baratheon, one of the many would-be kings of the series, as he mutters to himself, “Fewer.”
Kahleesi scared me. I almost gave up on her, but she came to her senses. ;)ReplyDelete
Oh, this is priceless!ReplyDelete
No, seriously. People buy books telling them how to use proper grammar. You should write one. With your sense of humour, it's sure to be a hit!
Arrrrggghhh...my body shudders head to toe and the pervasive, invasive, subversive "me and...."ReplyDelete
When I taught remedial English to incoming freshmen, more than thirty years ago, they did not make this mistake. Why have they let their children's language degenerate so?
He's loosely based on Richard III so of course his English would be good---snark.ReplyDelete
Really? How interesting - and how doomed. I haven't read the books or any of the back story, so I didn't know that.Delete
Did he really correct their grammar? Cool. Wonder if anyone other than English teachers caught it since it was rather subtle.ReplyDelete
well, language is a living thing and changes with time. not that I'm OK with bad grammar.ReplyDelete
I tend not to get too bent out of shape over these errors. I do think that we should "of" been taught more of the finer points of language. If you notice I have my daughter as a writer on my blog. She was to be my editor but it never happened.ReplyDelete
Ah! Modern communication is moving way too fast for me.ReplyDelete
Ha! I mutter that to my husband sometimes. He's never very impressed with me when I do, as I am not a native speaker, but I am an English teacher. I'm worried about making a mistake in this comment now.ReplyDelete
I feel the same way. But sometimes I use something like "invite" as an intentional colloquialism, even though I know it's wrong. Especially when I'm trying to sound folksy. :)ReplyDelete
I am also driven crazy by the inverse of the "Eugenia and me" example: When someone says, "David gave Eugenia and I tickets for the monster truck rally." AAAAAAAARGH! Some people have drilled into their heads that "Xxxx and I" is ALWAYS the proper construction, and it just ain't so!
By the way, I think "landfill" is one word. :P
There goes the image of English teacher perfection. You are correct about landfill, Steve!Delete
Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!ReplyDelete
Reading "bored of" drives me bonkers, along with would of; could of; should of; when the correct words are would have; could have; should have.
Also 'burs' under your saddle should be "burrs".
Whoops! Fixing it now. . . .Delete
Phew! - All repaired.Delete
Although I will say that "bur" is an alternate spelling. ;)
Hahaha! I too am a stickler for correct grammar. And in the written word, with my blog friends, even the most educated of them will occasionally use "it's" when they mean "its" -- drives me crazy. But the less and fewer thing gets me at the checkout counter, when I see "Five items or less." :-)ReplyDelete
I am afraid to leave a comment.ReplyDelete
Well, River and Steve found two misspellings in my post, so if you commit a faux pas, you'll be in good company!Delete
Oh, that's great. It makes me want to watch Game of Thrones!ReplyDelete
I beseech you not to get any free books from Amazon if you read electronically. They are often unedited and filled with misspellings and bad grammar. It's almost worth it to pay the full price! (Visiting you from Patti's blog.)ReplyDelete
Hear, hear! From one English teacher to another, it's like fingernails on the chalkboard, isn't it? I was listening to a person on the radio this afternoon who kept saying, "the real-a-tor this, real-a-tor that" until I wanted to yell, "Please! Just look at the word!"ReplyDelete
It is a relief to know I am not the only person on earth who goes around screaming "fewer" at the TV and radio!!! :)ReplyDelete
YES! Of course, I know all about this syndrome as my wife is a retired English teacher...:)ReplyDelete