Tuesday, March 19, 2019

Call of Nature


      Flipping channels last night we stumbled across the latest Lora Croft, Tomb Raider movie and enjoyed its mix of Raiders of the Lost Ark obstacles and obsessed bad guys, combined with the plucky heroine who survives just fine without always needing a man to bail her out. It was pretty good, and I appreciated the absence of Angelina Jolie pouting and posturing.
          As this new Lora fought her way through typhoons, jungles, and cave-ins, I was struck by the same thought I’ve been having as I watch Kate Beckinsale in the new Amazon Prime series The Widow. (Very good, by the way, with lots of plot turns and here’s another self-sufficient plucky-but-flawed heroine, even if she does inexplicably never lose the curl in her ponytail.)
          Does no one ever eat? If I had to go without sleep for days, chase bad guys, and alternatively be chased by bad guys, my blood sugar would have bottomed out after the first four hours. These women never have so much as a glass of juice. Once in a great while they might throw back a shot of tequila along with the guys, but that’s not going to provide the energy you’re going to need if you’re galloping around toting an AK47.
          And no one ever heeds the call of nature. In one scene, Kate wakes up in her jeep, having slept there all night. As she threw it into gear and hurtled off down the unpaved road, My Guy and I simultaneously had the same reaction:
          “What? She’s been there all night! Doesn’t she need to pee?”

12 comments:

  1. Ha! Biological needs take a back seat to action and plot, I guess!

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  2. Most things I watch they NEVER pee when getting up in the early morning. The edits are tight and that few seconds walking to the bathroom gets cut.

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  3. See your point. And why do the lady enforcers wear shoes that would kill your feet standing but they can run blocks in them while on empty stomachs and full bladders?

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  4. I've seen that movie and agree it's great, but have you noticed she spends a bi of time in the water? Probably pees right there in the ocean. Or river.
    But this leads into why so many Hollywood people are so thin, production time costs a fortune, and every time someone needs a bathroom break, production time is lost. So they don't eat, which greatly cuts down on lost production time, but does nothing for their health, with "stars" living on vitamin shots etc.

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    1. Good points all. I can see you've put some valuable thought into this, too.

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  5. I laughed at your observation that nobody ever pees or eats. It sure would make life easier, wouldn't it? :-)

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  6. OMG! Think of the time we'd save!

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  7. Nobody ever seems to pee in books or films.

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  8. When I was a kid, the lack of pee in all the books bothered me. Poor Laura and Pa and Ma. What about Henry Aldrich, pursued by Indians. He was so good at covering his tracks, but what about those so difficult to hide functions!
    A farming wife told me, as an adult, "we just lifted our dress and went on the spot. No underwear!" There's a Laura Ingalls Wilder image for ya!

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    1. Well, when you think about it, it would mean that much less laundry to do. No small thing when I assume they were boiling it in a vat in the yard.

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  9. AND makeup...they wake up in the morning all made up...nothing like me at all...staggering to the bathroom half asleep, naked face, morning mouth...headed for the toilet and then the toothbrush and the hairbrush:)

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