Saturday, January 23, 2016

The Big Leagues



     You would think that with retirement life would get easier, but I’m still doing things that scare me. Case in point, Wednesday night. A couple of weeks earlier I’d received a phone call out of the blue from a man I’d never heard of.

     I should be used to this with all the telemarketers trying to be our BFFs. But in this case, the call was from our town’s Rotary Club and even more weird, they were inviting me to come and speak. Since I had forgotten to get my booster shot against flattery, I said yes.


          As it turned out, I fell into the category of Local Author. What to talk about?  I figured I had about 3 ½ minutes of information about my writing to impart. Fabulous. Now I only had another 26 ½ allotted minutes to fill. 


          Wednesday night I took a deep breath and entered the local restaurant where the meeting was to be held. As it turned out, that was the most difficult part of the evening. From there on, I was treated like the celebrity I’m not. I received a raffle ticket for that evening’s prize, I was introduced to one kind gentleman after another, and someone magically produced a glass of wine for me.

          My tablemates and I had just started chatting when the business of the night steamed into action. We all stood up for the pledge of allegiance and then Walt across the table from me was asked to lead us in song.  I opened my mouth, ready with “God Bless America,”  but fortunately  I didn’t get out a note. Suddenly everyone was belting out “I’ve Been Working on the Railroad,” a quirky song choice that no one ever did explain.

          Then we rolled on to all the other agenda items I remember from my days in similar organizations – finance reports, donation reports, and plans for upcoming events. For many years I belonged to a women educators organization, and I know my way around your basket raffles and split-the-pots, but these fellows had turned money gathering into an art form. There was the raffle for that night’s prize, but if you won that, you had the option of instead trying for something else, which first had to be gained by someone cutting a deck of cards and revealing a particular card. After this, members were obligated to donate a dollar if they had forgotten to don the required Rotary Club badge – a button the size of our bread and butter plates. This was followed by people paying yet another dollar to say what they were particularly happy about that night (wedding anniversary, the Patriot’s NFL record, and so forth). 


          As it turned out, I had a whale of a good time. I had managed to come up with a topic (a short lesson about some of the categories and characteristics in the murder mystery genre), no one fell asleep, and I remembered how much I had once enjoyed teaching. Not only that, but I had a free dinner and came away with this really nifty pen.


   

 I’ve clearly hit the big time.

19 comments:

  1. well, if that's not proof of fame, I don't know what is.

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  2. Aren't they wonderful! I once gave a talk to my uncle's Kiwanis, was treated to all the meeting joys you tell of, and received the best ice cream scoop in our entire house as a thank you gift.

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    1. Hard to find fault with a roomful of nice men who do good works.

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  3. Well, a pen for a writer seems appropriate! If you speak as cleverly as you write, I'm sure everyone had a good time.
    This made me smile because it brought back many memories of my teaching days when the local Rotary in the small town where I taught would honor a senior of the year and I would accompany him or her to the Rotary lunch meeting to make the introduction. The student had to give a small before the prize of a scholarship would be handed over. Same deal with the dollars and the raffles and the meeting while the student sat beside me quaking in his or her boots in anticipation. It was such a welcoming and jolly group of people that the student soon lost all fear and enjoyed talking to them.

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    1. Everyone who fears public speaking should be given an opportunity like that.

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  4. iT'S A TREAT TO B BACK IN THE GAME FOR A WHILE. SENIORS DO HAVE LOTS TO OFFER.

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    1. The fact that most in the room were my age or several years older didn't hurt, either.

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  5. A speech? better you than me. I can barely make conversation, a speech would have me completely brain dead.
    Nice that you had a great time and got a neat pen.

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  6. How fun! I've never been to a Rotary meeting, at least not that I can remember, but I've always imagined them unfolding exactly like that.

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    1. Yep, no funny hats but when I asked one if they had a secret handshake, he said, "Well, it's secret!"

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  7. No one fell asleep. That's the key, mate. Keep them entertained. As someone who has done a bit of public speaking, I dread what we call the "graveyard slot", straight after lunch, especially if it's a good lunch. I've been on the other side... dozing off. :-)

    Good on you for coming up trumps on this one. Thanks for the tale.

    Greetings from London.

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    1. Yeah, exactly like teaching. After lunch the kids were either wired from seeing all their friends and romantic liasons, or asleep.

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  8. It sounds wonderful! I know how hard it can be to get back in the game after having "retired" from it all. You wrote a wonderful piece here, and I'm smiling big and will continue to do so for awhile yet. :-)

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  9. So glad it was you and not me. I am terrified of public speaking. I would rather be covered with spiders, snakes and hanging from a tall building.
    Congrats on pulling it off so well.

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  10. You are braver than I would be under the same circumstances. However, it sounds like a wonderful evening where both you and the Rotarians learned something new. The pen is a good keepsake.

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  11. I love reading anything you write! I'm sure I would enjoy hearing you speak! A button the size of your bread and butter plate! You always make me laugh.

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  12. The big time, indeed! Now it begins!!!

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    Replies
    1. From your lips to Simon and Schuster's ears.

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