Friday, June 30, 2017

All Wet

It’s official.  I’m a humorless curmudgeon. Maybe not all the time, but I have my moments.
One of those moments came this morning at the YMCA.

I was a little late to what I thought would be my regular water aerobics class, which as I keep pointing out to anyone who will listen, can be quite a workout if you actually do everything with gusto.

I’ve written about an experience mirroring today’s before, but today’s horror was profound enough that I need to vent once again.

I opened the locker room door to be hit in the forehead by a blast of music ricocheting off the tile walls surrounding the Y’s pool. A woman in lime green shorts, fuchsia T, and backward lime green baseball cap was gyrating at the pool edge. An assortment of gray, white, and late-in-life blond heads bounced in semi-time to the music.

Pool Zumba.

I paused in my stride, reconsidering. Still, I was there, I was already in my swimsuit, and last night’s chocolate covered almonds were weighing on my conscience, along with a few other places.

Let just say that frenetic enthusiasm isn’t enough to win over my cold, cold heart. Grandmothers and the few grandfathers around me smiled and hooted gamely, but I just wasn’t feeling it. Sure, I like pelvic thrusts as much as the next person, but they don’t translate into much of a workout in four feet of water. What exercise I did get was from my fast footwork of trying to follow a routine that moved too quickly to accommodate the concept of water resistance.

Give me back my jumping jacks, jogging, and pool noodle any day.


  1. You are so not alone in curmudgeondom (perhaps not a word, but...).
    The water aerobics I used to watch while swimming laps (and I need to get back to it) were run by just such people. Nublie, young and loud. And I couldn't see that much of a workout was achieved.

  2. Have you started to use phrases like, "back in the day" and "all the music sounds the same"? I ask because I have found myself saying these things. With being a curmudgeon comes wisdom! -Jenn

  3. I love the word curmudgeon. I am definitely turning into one myself. I hear you about the incongruous approach to senior fitness. Made me laugh, too. :-)

  4. Zumba IN the water?? I wouldn't have thought it possible.

  5. There is an age limit for zumba, and I believe it is five, instructor included. After that, you can call the pool police.

  6. water zumba...sounds like an oxymoron to me.

  7. Ha! Well, I guess it's always good to try new things, right? Now you KNOW you don't like Pool Zumba. (If there was ever any doubt.)


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