I
was running a tad late the other morning, caused as usual by a few too many
minutes in front of what a non-techno friend calls “the machine”, aka my
computer. Amazing how it can suck up time like a chamois on a wet car.
I steered my car around a corner on my way to
pick up my friend and it occurred to me that my recollection of putting on my
sandals was a bit hazy.
I
wiggled my left foot and then carefully moved around the toes on the gas pedal.
They felt the same. I did remember putting a black sandal on my right
foot, but there the memory stopped. It occurred to me that my red sandals do
exactly the same kind of stretchy, loopy thing around the toe and over the
arch. Oh dear.
I
arrived in my friend’s driveway and was able to pause and look down. All was
well. Another dodgy moment averted.
I’m
not sure whether to be reassured or not by the fact that this is not a new
occurrence. I can recall sitting in
boring meetings at work ten years ago and playing a silent game with myself of,
“what am I wearing?” The principal at the front of the auditorium would be droning
on about some pointless administrative detail and I would stare ahead, trying
to remember what it was I had put on my body that morning.
I
can also arrive at my destination after a good half-hour’s drive with no clear
idea of how I got there. Oh sure, I stopped when I was supposed to, and didn’t
leave a wake of bodies in the roadway behind me (I don’t think), but the details
of the trip evaded me.
I
like to think that my mind is operating on a higher plane, that it doesn’t
become consumed with everyday mundane details. Unfortunately, in reality my
drifty moments are usually caught up in wondering about the origin of
polydactyl cats, or how to stop the chipmunks from eating all our hosta.
I do that, too, get on autopilot and wonder how the heck I got where I did. That's funny about the sandals. :-)
ReplyDeleteYes, when the spacey driving thing happens I try not to tell my passengers.
DeleteWhen going to college, as an adult so no excuse, looked down and had 2 different shoes on, made a quick dash to the shoe store.
ReplyDeleteOnce arranged for a salt lick to be placed in the staff lounge before a staff meeting, the principal was not happy.
Something tells me that my faculty meetings would have been a lot more interesting if you'd been there.
DeleteMy nasty neighbor wore one black shoe and one brown shoe to her snooty workplace, and she called me to dig in her closet to fix the situation.
ReplyDeleteI think they call that highway hypnosis. It's common, I'm told.
Too bad you couldn't have suddenly developed a broken leg in order to leave her mis-matched for the rest of the day.
DeleteSometimes we get used to doing stuff that it seems we are on auto pilot.
ReplyDeleteI used to listen to audio books on my 35 minute drive to work and when I got to the parking lot has no memory of what happened after I left the house. I quite listening to those books.
ReplyDeleteYep - I've missed more than one exit doing exactly that.
DeleteI plead guilty. I too often zone out.
ReplyDeleteI laughed when you were describing racking your brain about what you were wearing. I volunteer on a crisis line. Early one morning a sexual fantasy caller (sigh) asked what colour knickers I was wearing. I hadn't a clue...
Now that is funny - but probably just as well you couldn't help him out!
DeleteI do that driving thing also. Scary but like you, I leave no smushed up cars in my wake---that I know of.
ReplyDeleteThat's our story and we're sticking to it.
DeleteI play a mind game every morning, called what did I have for supper last night. I generally must reconstruct, starting with was it on a plate or in a bowl, but I generally come up with it, and I give my mind a pass for another day.
ReplyDeleteThat would have the useful purpose of saving you from a Groundhog Day of eating the same thing for dinner every night.
DeleteI used to operate that way but no more. With my limited vision I concentrate hard to take in as many details as I possibly can. It's almost like I need to treasure each moment and yet I also feel an anxiety because this loss is not reversable any more.
ReplyDeleteMy auto pilot days are gone but I recall them very well.
Thank you. That's the kind of comment that makes me pause and as the writer below suggests, reminds me to be more mindful in the moment.
DeleteIt's what's called going through the motions! When I had seizures, I would not make new memories. If i was thinking about something I didn't remember it.
ReplyDeleteThat must have been quite difficult to cope with, Red.
DeleteMy husband wore mismatched shoes to town...he drove home 14 miles to change. Brain on auto...put driving as a priority every time because it is so easy to get lulled by the road noise and movement and familiar road...it is a form of distracted driving...so be present in the moment! :)
ReplyDeleteGood advice.
DeleteI have whole days where I wonder what the heck I did yesterday!
ReplyDeleteI guess that brings the happiness of each day feeling fresh and new. . .?
Deleteoh, yes, driving with no recollection of it. it's a good thing our subconscious minds take over and do all the right things.
ReplyDeleteI've done the same thing! On the way to my daughter's house, a one hour drive on a long country road, I was so totally out if it when a flash and screeching tires broke my trance. I had driven through a stop sign, going 60 mph. The oncoming car, going 55 to 60 mph too, swerved and missed me. I came within two seconds of being killed. Her car would have hit me right on the driver's side.
ReplyDelete